One thing is for sure: life can be uncertain. This can lead to anxiety, overwhelm, and worry, even for believers. Holly Snell, the author of Dancing On My Ashes, joins us on today's podcast, reminding us of the one thing we can count on when life throws a curve ball.
If you are ready to become the woman God says you already are, you have to join me in Clarity+Courage, my cost-effective coaching group for Christian women.
Learn more and enroll at www.myhappyvault.com/clarityandcourage
Questions? Email Jill directly at Jill@thehappiestlives.com
One thing is for sure: life can be uncertain. This can lead to anxiety, overwhelm, and worry, even for believers. Holly Snell, the author of Dancing On My Ashes, joins us on today's podcast, reminding us of the one thing we can count on when life throws a curve ball.
If you are ready to become the woman God says you already are, you have to join me in Clarity+Courage, my cost-effective coaching group for Christian women.
Learn more and enroll at www.myhappyvault.com/clarityandcourage
Questions? Email Jill directly at Jill@thehappiestlives.com
You're listening to the Happiest Lives podcast with Jill Lillard, episode number 33. Welcome to the Happiest Lives podcast, where you'll learn to think better, feel better and become the woman God says you already are. Here's your host, jill Lillard hey, hey, everybody, you're listening to this episode in December, but I am putting it together, recording it, in October. I like to be ahead of things. I don't like to put things off. If I'm not two steps ahead, I feel like I'm behind. That strategy works pretty good for me and gives me a little margin in my life. For December, I wanted to really just take it easy a little bit, which really means in October. I was taking it a little bit more easy because October was a really super busy month for me. We did the Happiest Lives Weekend, which is a weekend that I plan for all my graduates of the Happiest Lives Academy and the alumni. So the current year's graduates, the ones who graduated in May they get to come to my house in October and spend the weekend in my home. They stay in my home and in my sister-in-law's home Stephanie, who is one of the coaches in the Happiest Lives Academy. We just plan a special weekend for them. It doesn't cost them anything, except they do have to pay to travel and get here and they have to pay for their food. Outside of that, they get to stay at our house for free and everything that we put together. We do it for them. They don't have to pay for that portion of it. We had a wonderful weekend in October with them coming to our home. Then, two weeks after that, we had the HeartScan workshop, which was over Zoom one hour, and you guys were all invited to it and it was amazing and wonderful. Really, that's how I recruit my next year's Academy members. At this point, while you are listening to this, we have had people enroll for the Happiest Lives Academy. Again, if you want to enroll, there's still time. I'm at that point where I'm mailing out, getting all the packages and stuff ready to mail out to those who are going to be in the program in January. I'm going to keep enrollment open throughout this month, even if you're at the last minute. You might get your stuff a little bit later if you put off enrolling, but there's still time. I would love to have you there In this episode.
Speaker 1:I just wanted to share a talk, an inspiration that we had with one of my good friends, my childhood friends, holly Snell. We were very blessed and honored to have her come share with us at our weekend, together in one of my best friends, heidi, who's also my neighbor and who's the worship leader at our church, who is Holly's sister. She led worship for us and that was incredible. She brought the band in and so we had some intimate worship and then Holly got to share with us some things that God has put on her heart right now. The time was such a blessing. I wanted to share her conversation with us, with you.
Speaker 1:I hope you enjoy this episode, as I'm going to share a recording from our Happiest Lives weekend. Welcome, holly Snell, who she is the author of Dancing on my Ashes. If you aren't familiar with her, her and her sister, heather, wrote this book after losing both of their husbands. They drowned in an unexpected river drowning many years ago, and so they wrote a book about it and how they both processed through this and faced this loss, this grief. She's joining us. She joined us at the weekend and she's going to join you today on the podcast, so enjoy.
Speaker 2:Well, right out of the gate, I find myself marveling in the orchestration of God. Heidi, the other day, two days ago maybe, sent me the list of songs that I didn't really look at them. It's just like, well, I'm not leading them so great, but I really didn't look at them. And even up until 10 o'clock last night I was wrestling on what exactly I felt like the Lord was wanting to speak to all of us in this first session, second session I feel strong about that. The first session, I was really questioning and wondering, and so as I wrestled, the Lord brought me. It was something I've taught on that. It was several years ago, but it's really interesting to me, talking about how to overcome fear in this season and in this time that we live in. And so really interesting. Then, heidi, as I'm listening to just, I will build my life, I will put my trust in the one who holds all things together. So we're declaring that over our lives here in this room. And then we move into the song I belong to Jesus, and I was a little knocked out just by the Holy Spirit. Again, the chorus says you are with me, father, you're for me. Fear will never conquer me because I belong to Jesus, I'm never alone, I'm never abandoned. Oh fear, you'll never conquer me. We can speak to those things and say you're not going to win because I belong to Jesus. And so hearing that was an exclamation mark from the Lord that he was indeed allowing me to wrestle over what to share today. But I also realized I'm sharing it because I've been wrestling with fear myself A lot of times.
Speaker 2:When you hear people a speaker or a pastor or a preacher or a teacher a lot of times the topic they pick you may think that's just maybe rather random, but it's most often times something that they're wrestling through themselves, and so it's the journey that the Lord has been personally on and you just get to kind of peer into the things that they're learning in that process. So that's kind of where I find myself today. So here's some common fears that I have at different times in my life. I can be scared of the dark when I'm outside at night. Earlier this week I was walking my little 11 pound dog out in the dark. It was like eight o'clock at night and she's a little, she gets spooked easy. And so now you throw in all the Halloween decorations in my neighborhood. I mean, with every leaf that was blowing on the ground. She was spooked, and then so was I, but, and I'm just like literally singing worship songs as I'm walking.
Speaker 2:It was a long walk, it wasn't just like just going out to go potty. It was like a long walk, and so there were times that I was finding myself singing songs loudly, just in case someone thought they might jump up and snatch either one of us. A more serious fear that I sometimes wrestle with is fear of death, particularly over my husband or my children. Some of you know my story, that I have walked through a lot of loss in my life. My mom has walked through loss in her life and we became widows within the same 12 month period, together along with another sister of mine, and so walking through a lot of loss that that now, while, yes, I've been remarried, I still have triggers that come alongside with that, and I think many of you probably have different triggers in our lives things that catch us off guard, things that we're not expecting, that put fear back in the forefront of our minds, and so the death of either my husband or my children can oftentimes creep up, and I have to speak over that fear and kind of call it out and ask the Lord to cover it and give me fear. So I'm coming to you today from an honest place of struggle. I come to you from a place where God is still working on me. He's not perfected. He's still tweaking, teaching, reminding and revealing things to me and how to trust him when fear comes my way.
Speaker 2:Now, if we zoom out, take it a little bit further what's happening in this world? 2023, we thought 2020 was next. 2023, in different ways, is equally as next, if not more, crazy. We've got the ongoing war between Ukraine and Russia. That is still heart wrenching. We've got the countless natural disasters that have been happening all over this world all year long, and it seems like they're increasing and growing with intensity. For some of you who may geek out on some of this stuff, I'm one of those people but there's a lot of AI conversation happening right now artificial intelligence and is it going to overtake the world?
Speaker 2:Is this the mark of the beast? We have all these kinds of questions that can kind of come up and that can create a little bit of fear inside of us. And now, as of a week ago, we have the war in Israel, which I would guess has taken our breath away just seeing how quickly a lives have been turned upside down. And I'm not even going to get into the political climate of what the US is getting ready to go into, with next year being a year where we're voting for president. So the spirit of fear and worry can rage. It is raging, it feels like, in this world. It's raging in the United States. It's raging in our states, our cities, our towns, our churches, our homes. It's everywhere. And some of us we worry to death and then others worry others to death. Can we just think of that person who is the person who's always worrying others to death?
Speaker 2:But it is time for us to cling and anchor ourselves to scripture when fear arises. And I'm reminded of 2 Timothy 1,7, and this is a scripture that my dad even put to music when I was a little girl, and I'm not going to see it, since this is being recorded, I'm going to embarrass myself, but it's the common scripture that again. I want to say it because we need it today. God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and a sound mind. About a year ago I heard Dr Tony Evans. He said this and this was just a funny little example he used. He said.
Speaker 2:One man said if I have to worry about one more thing. It's going to take me two more weeks to get to it because I have so many things to worry about. Another man said to his friend I will pay you $1,000 if you'll do my worrying for me. And his friend responded oh, I'll take that, I'll take that worry for you. Where's the $1,000? He said that's the first thing you have to worry about.
Speaker 2:Worry is rampant and we all have worries. There's all kinds of things I think we all struggle with. I'm sure in this room it can look very differently, and then there's going to be some common core fears that can creep up in our lives. For those of us who have children, we worry about them. We're concerned about them when they go off to school, when they sleep at night sometimes, or what school are they going to go to? Who are they going to marry? What's their life going to look like? We've got all of these concerns and that's maybe a more spiritual way to say worry. We can use the word I'm not worried, I'm concerned. Well, they're the same thing, friends, and we need to recognize it for what it is.
Speaker 2:But scripture says seek ye first, seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and then all these things will be added. So the key here is the word first. What are you seeking first? Because the reason that we say worried is a lifestyle is because we're not keeping first things first. We're not seeking him first, we're not anchoring yourself to who he is and what he does for us.
Speaker 2:His promises, in his word, are yes and amen. He is for us, he is here to protect us, he is our comforter, he is our shelter, he is the lifter of our head, our strong tower, our mighty fortress that we can run to when we're scared. And we don't always run to him first. But what are those things that we run to when life feels like it's spinning out of control? Or we just lay in bed at night worrying and wondering that this was me this week. I didn't sleep well this night this week and a lot of times I was thinking about what was happening in Israel and that was grieving my heart. I was thinking about a potential move for our family and that was causing my head to spin a little bit. And I just heard the Lord just say seek me first, seek me first and all these things, they'll work itself out because you seek me first and so, but I know oftentimes if you're like me and maybe you're far better. There are other things that we often run to when we feel fear or when we're concerned.
Speaker 2:So some of those things might be running to a best friend or a spouse asking what their thoughts are or just letting them in on it. Some of you may bottle it up and just stuff it down and as you keep stepping it until it's going to just overflow and come out with just incredible anxiety and fear. Some of you, in some ways, some of you, know a lot of people on Facebook ask for recommendations or they're concerned about something. So they're asking, probably, what do you think about this or what do you think about that? And some people look to the clouds, looking at the cloud formations. Some people look for astrology and I don't recommend that at all. I'm just saying these are examples of some things that we do. Sometimes we're looking for answers in all the wrong places.
Speaker 2:I remember when I was not yet dating my now husband, aaron. We were living here in Jefferson City. Things were weird because I was a widow and grieving and still figuring things out. I was starting to like him and feeling bad about that. Little did I know that he was kind of struggling with the same thoughts and like, oh my goodness, I like this girl and he's six years younger than me. So he was also like there's no way she would have me. And I'm thinking there's no way he would want me. I'm thinking I've got so much baggage. These are things we weren't talking to one another about. But he tells me now there was one day he was closer to downtown Jefferson City and he went out for a run, and so he just needed to work out his frustration and his fears and concerns. And so, as he's running, he's talking to the Lord about me. Like what do I do about Holly? I'm so confused. I really like her. And so he's like Lord, I just need you to give me a sign. I just need you to give me a sign. And literally, as he comes around the corner, it's Holly Drive. He was looking for a sign and pointed to get one. That's so cute, it is cute, it is cute. So that's kind of a fun little thing about us.
Speaker 2:But the Lord speaks in all kinds of different ways, but the fact of the matter is we just need to seek him first, go to him first, instead of all of these other places. I think so many times too. I think the Lord must be sometimes shaking his head and just going when are they going to get this? The fact is I've already spoken and it's in my word. If they would just go to my word. So, also, when I'm saying, seek him first, it's be in the scriptures. Be in this holy book that gives us direction for our lives, because the fact is he has already spoken, if we would just open our Bibles.
Speaker 2:Isaiah 41.10 says this fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, I will help you and I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Again, the scriptures I'm going to share today aren't those hidden things that we don't hear very often, but sometimes I think they become so uncommon we don't listen anymore, and this may be one of those. So again, I'm going to read it one more time Isaiah 41.10, fear not, fear not, for I am with you. Think of this, the God of the universe. He is saying I am with you. If we really believe that we wouldn't fear, we really wouldn't fear. And then he says be not dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. And if we lived our lives as if this were true, we would not struggle with fear. If he is God and he is, and we're talking about God. Yahweh, that is the one true God. He is trustworthy.
Speaker 2:I remember going back to my first husband now. I remember when we were standing in his graveside and putting him into the ground, and I remember walking up to the casket. My life had just been turned upside down. I have a two-year-old daughter and I'm just. Everything changed when he passed away. There was so much fear. The Lord was present, but my concerns were overwhelming. Where do I go? What do I do? What's my identity? Who am I now without him? And I just remember walking up to his casket and I don't know how many people were there. There's not much. I even remember about that day, but this is one of the clearest memories I had.
Speaker 2:I walked up to his casket and I knelt. The place was quiet and I just remember saying to the Lord as I knelt there, I'm like what now? What now? What do I do? Where's my life going? Lord, you called us into ministry, you called us to do these great things, but I feel like it's just over and I don't even know where to begin now. And just, it was near audible. It felt audible how the Lord responded to me. Very clearly in my heart I heard the Lord say Holly, this is not your end. This is a new beginning and I have plans for you, good plans for you.
Speaker 2:And I just remember it was so clear what I felt like I heard from the Lord in that moment, speaking to my fear. I remember getting up and I went over. It was actually Pastor Lowell who was there. He actually flew up to Western New York to be with me and I walked over to him. I'm like did you hear that? And he's like what are you talking about? And I'm like the Lord just spoke. He said, and I told him what the Lord said he goes. Oh, I believe it. I believe, holly. I heard it too. He was comforting me, but I've seen now how true that is.
Speaker 2:We have low grade fears and then we have big, ginormous fears. We have fears in our marriage, fears with our kids, fears about our future, fears about the direction for our life, because we all know there's so many ups and downs. If you could have spoken to your 20-year-old self and said this is what's going to happen, holy cow, aren't you glad the Lord doesn't tell you everything. I looked this up last night because I remember I'd heard it a long time ago, but the words fear not are found in the Bible 365 times. There's a fear not for every single day in the year. So this is not something that is just a moment that the Lord just speaks. At one time the Lord says it's over and over and, over and over again Fear not, fear not. Sometimes it's be strong and courageous. Or here it is, for I'm with you. Really, at the end of the day, if he's with us, that's all we need.
Speaker 2:I want to take us to probably the most common song of all. We could all probably cite it together Psalm 23. But I do just want to sit on this for a few minutes, and it's interesting too. Also, the song that we just ended together was saying you Are my Shepherd, and that's exactly where we're going to, psalm 23,. It's a song of David, and I'm just going to read this for a minute.
Speaker 2:The Lord is my shepherd. And again, listen to this with maybe fresh ears. I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul, he leads me in paths of righteousness for his namesake, and even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me, your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil, my cup it overflows. Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever, forever. Again. Incredibly common song, but can bring great comfort if we would stop and look at it with fresh eyes again.
Speaker 2:David, he starts off talking about how the Lord is a shepherd, that he causes him to lie down in green pastures, that he provides rest, that he restores his soul, that he that he puts in by still waters, he leads him in paths of righteousness. And it says even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. And then there's this incredibly beautiful shift that happens in Psalm 23. There's two, actually, where David no longer is talking about God. He turns and now he's talking directly to God. He says because you are with me, I do not need to fear, because you are with me, your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
Speaker 2:And then he goes from a shepherd to as talking about God as a host. So you prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, you anoint my head with oil and my cup it overflows Goodness and mercy. It will. It will follow me, it will chase after me, it will pursue me, and that's the actual translation. It's not just this kind of you think of, maybe, a slow follow the days, all the days of my life. No, it's in hot pursuit. It is pursuing us. His goodness and his mercy is coming hard and fast behind us. And you think about David's life. Does he actually know what he's talking about here? Can I just say, aha, yes, he knows exactly what he's talking about here. As he was a shepherd, he understood what it was like to take care of a flock, and then he knows what it's like to walk through the valley of the shadow of death which is an actual place.
Speaker 2:Side note, we all think of it as this kind of example that he's using, but it's also a specific place. There is a valley of the shadow of death, and that's a dangerous place, or was a dangerous place, and that's why he's saying I will fear no evil because you're with me. And who do we know was in hot pursuit over David out in the wilderness? It was King Saul. You remember the story. There's lots of them where King Saul and all these men. They're coming hard and fast after David and he's already been anointed King by Samuel. The Lord's got this calling upon his life and he's still trying to honor Saul. But he's running for his life. And so David and his men, where are they? They're hiding in a cave. You all remember this story. And then King Saul, he needs to go to the bathroom, right, and so what does he do? He goes into the cave. So I think we can all use our sanctified imagination and we realize that we're not just talking about number one. Saul was taking the number two.
Speaker 2:All right, because that's the only way we possible for David to cut a piece of his robe off without King Saul noticing. But we can forget, like we can read the story of Saul coming after David and we're thinking if he was just going to the bathroom? No, he was really going to the bathroom. And then, david, he speaks up. He's like, oh my gosh, who is this? I cannot believe. This is the person who's after me trying to kill me. And he's actually here going the bathroom, stinking up this cave. And so he cuts the robe off. Saul gets down with his business, he walks out of the cave. He's going down the hill and David comes out and what does he say? Don't go in there. No, that's not what he says.
Speaker 2:He yells out to Saul and he says hey, basically like I've got a piece of your row, I could have killed you, but I didn't, and um, and of course then Saul's like he kind of repents for that brief moment and says I'm sorry, david, I shouldn't have been following after you. So does David know what he's talking about in Psalm 23? The answer is yes. He knows what it's like to be be chased after. He knows what he's talking about here, and then when?
Speaker 2:he's talking about God as a host. He's also just talking about he prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies. Think about the many meals and dinners, or suppers as you say. Some of you may say I know my mom says supper, I say dinner. Um, the many meals that David had with Saul where he was his enemy and.
Speaker 2:But the Lord prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies, he anoints his head with oil and it's just saying the goodness and the mercy, it will, it will follow me, it will chase after me. David absolutely knew what he was talking about. So in this room today we're sitting here Christian sisters, or firsters as my sister likes to say, heather and I, friends and sisters combined. It's easy to talk about overcoming fear and worry or when we're in this setting, but it can not be as easy when life hits really hard and we get a call or a diagnosis or something that changes our lives and we just wonder how do I take next steps? We've got to remember that God is ultimately in control. He is still sovereign.
Speaker 2:And just one more beautiful passage, again very familiar, is Psalm 139, where it says you have searched me, oh Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You perceive my thoughts from afar, you discern my going out and my lying down, you're familiar with all my ways. And then verse 16 says your eyes, they saw my unformed body.
Speaker 2:All the days were ordained for me that were written in your book before one of them ever came to be. It's kind of like this when you go to the grocery store and you're selecting your milk, you're looking for the type of milk 1%, 2%, fat free, whatever it is right but what's the very next thing? You're looking for Expiration date. That's right, because we all have an expiration date. Scripture's clear. We know it to be true. Psalm 139 says so, that all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. We have a beginning and we have an end, and every one of our days, even all the ones in between, are all being filtered through his sovereign hands. He knew that each of us would be here today. He knew the stories and the journeys that each of you have taken to even be, here to have any contact with Jill.
Speaker 2:I can't imagine the stories that are represented here in this room, the journeys, the ups, the downs, that the Lord is aware of all of them. And Scripture even says that he can delight in every detail of our lives. How is that even possible, that the Lord can delight in the ugliness, in the heartache, in the brokenness that can happen in our lives? How is that even possible? It's possible because he can redeem it, he can bring glory to him through it and it can be for our good. We understand his care and his love for us, even when things don't make sense and there's a lot of things in our world that's not making sense right now. But we have to remind ourselves that if we believe Scripture to be true, then we have to trust Him. He is sovereign and he is filtering everything through His hands. Philippians 4, 6, and 7,. This is my last little bit. Here it says don't worry about anything. Instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need. Can we just do that sometimes? Sometimes we just need to tell Him what we need and then we thank Him. It says thank Him for all he has done. So there's four commands in that little bit it says don't worry about anything, pray about everything, tell God what you need and then thank Him for what he's done. And then it says in verse 7, then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand, because His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. We need to pray, we need to seek Him, we ask Him to have control.
Speaker 2:There's a story in the Old Testament it's in Isaiah, and he talks about the year King Uzziah died. And it was a bad year, he says. But he said but then I looked up and what did I see? I saw God on His throne. And when he saw God on His throne, it put things in proper perspective His circumstances, his worry, his fears. It drove Him to His knees when he said what was Me? Who am I? Basically Lord, you are everything. I am nothing. Again, what's God in His rightful place? And reminds us he is ultimately in control. But we are so consumed with our circumstances Sometimes that's just hard to see and sometimes we need these simple reminders and we need to be like Isaiah, who looks up and when he looks up, he sees God on His throne. So even today, as we may have a little fear here and there whether what's ever happening in Israel or the things that's happening in our families, the things that's happening in our health, our future. We can say Lord, you are in control.
Speaker 2:Our family and I we've been through a journey, just spiritually this year where we've really been seeking God. We knew, in fact it was when we were here at Christmastime. My husband says to me Holly, I think the Lord is getting ready to make a major shift in our lives, and I don't know what that is. Do you feel it? And I said no, I don't feel it, I don't feel it. And so, from from that break till now, we've had different offers for different positions that sound amazing and incredible, things that we considered a little bit prayed about, but just didn't have a piece about them. And then, just recently, we felt the Lord actually asking us to trust Him in a shift in that where we could still lead the ministry that we lead but be permanently living here in Missouri, our ministries in Texas. And so we prayed about it.
Speaker 2:Aaron brought it to me. I said he was crazy, there's no way. This makes no sense. Our board will not go for this. We brought it to our board and they said this is a lot to process. Can we just pray about it? And then we'll circle back up. And sure enough they did. We came back together and so they're like we're all for it. We think the Lord is in this and you've got the right leadership team in place who can run things on the daily, but still you can oversee it. And then come, we'll still be making lots of trips down to Texas. But we began to pray about it and just we told the board that we weren't 100% on it yet, but very likely this is what we wanted to do, but we just wanted to continue to pray a little bit more.
Speaker 2:We had to share this with our six-year-old daughter, who is a junior in high school, who we always told we will never move until after we graduate high school, so a little over a week ago, she realizes it's getting more serious and we began to tell her about we're likely going to be moving. And it was met with tears, frustration. We expected it for sure, but just in one week's time. I spent this week with her and we had a lot of girl time together and I just wanted her to initiate conversation. I didn't want to press, but she comes to me and she said you know, I've been praying about it. She goes I have good days about this and I have bad days about this and I'm like well, cheers that there's even any good days. Okay, this is encouraging. And she said I really do ultimately feel like the Lord is giving me a piece about this. And she said he's helping me see the possibilities and the positive things that could be with this move. And as I was sitting there and listening to her, I felt a tap from the Holy Spirit and he was telling me it's like, polly, this move isn't just my best for you and Erin, if this is a move that I'm calling you to, it's also my best for Eva. She's not just along for the ride, she's just not late to us because she's our daughter, but like the Lord has a plan for her even in this.
Speaker 2:And so I told her. I said this may be hard to understand right now. I said, but I feel like the Lord wants me to say this, like this move is for you too. And I said and it is scary and I have my feelings go back and forth on this. I said, but if God is in this, he will take care of us and he will show us what to do. So there, just let me in on the things I've been wrestling with, even in this past week, but out of the mouth of a 16 year old, because she's seeking him first and saying okay, lord, I have a lot of feelings about this right now, but will you speak to my heart and speak clearly so I can hear you? And so I'm sure she's going to still have some bad days as the impending move comes, but I praise the Lord that she's willing to listen to his voice.
Speaker 2:Scripture says Jesus says my sheep know my voice, so let us hear his voice today. Whatever you want to speak to your heart today, as you retreat and be together, spend time with him, worship, and he can speak through so many things through songs, through his word to our hearts, and sometimes it can even sound audible, but it's just for you. So let him speak today, be open to what he has for you today. Lay it out on the table and give him your yes today. Whatever he asks, say Lord, I give you my yes, I'm all in. Even if it doesn't make sense, even if I don't like it and even if it hurts a little bit, I'm going to give you my yes today. So we're going to trust him. He will be faithful to work things out because he is for us.